Saturday, October 25, 2014

All We Have is Now

Seems obvious right?  Why is this such a simple, yet complicated topic?  Honestly it is simple.  All we have is now and that is reality.  I'm all for making future plans or learning from the past.  However, don't waste energy on either the past or worrying about the future because all we have is now.
   I will be completely honest about why I just thought about writing this entry.  I are chipotle which is not good for me, then was shaking my head in disgust thinking well if I had kept exercising, I'd be fit by now.  Okay, maybe that's true, but fuck it, all I have is now.  I can accept that I am not fit and make a decision to change that now and go forward.  I should be fit really doesn't mean anything at this very moment.  I looked at myself in the mirror and said should, smoud, and said screw that all you have is now.  I know smoud isn't a word.  Oh well.
   It's never too late to change things right now.  I don't give a shit about being too old or this and that.  I admit to not being good about taking my advice on my accounts.  Hopefully I will this time, or better yet someone who reads this will be inspired by this.  I only say that because I hope this helps someone who's struggling.  I don't write these things for credit ever.
  So, let's go back to the concept of now for a moment.  Everything is fine right now.  I will sometimes complain about things I have to do in the future.  I worry about stuff and 99% of the worrying is bullshit.  So, I ask you if you're worrying, what is wrong with right now?  My only problem right now is that I ate too much at Chipotle in North Brunswick.  So, I'll eat healthy from here on out, I hope. Anyway, that's not a huge problem.  I am not making light of things people have to go through.  People go through many a rough time.  Just stay in the now and deal with it one step at a time.  I have a cat meowing at me, so I'll end this here.

Tuesday, September 30, 2014

The antidote to violence

This is a poem I am working on setting to music.  I'm a bit tired and over stressed with work, so I was thinking about how love conquers fear.  Very important stuff.

What's with all the violence in the world?  Shooting after shooting and constant hostility.  Every time I see the news I get sickened.  Where is the humility?  I ask you, why is there  so much anger and hate?  Why can't people just love one another?  It should be innate.  These are questions I ponder.

Wtf is going on in this crazy world?  So much bullying and insults being hurled.  wtf is bullying all about?  Bullies are people full of self doubt.  Insecure people being cowards.  People should send flowers.  Lots of unanswered questions as violence increases.  When we love one another it decreases.  So, let's send out love before the world falls to pieces.  Peace is the answer, and that comes from love.  Love is the better option when push comes to shove.
   Oh how violence disgusts me.
 Love, patience and tolerance are
key.  The stinking news is negative
shit, which puts my emotions in a bottomless pit.  Oh how they like to scare us with terrible things someone did.  Why not put positive things on the grid?  Negative shit keeps the violence going.  Sewing love is the antidote to violence, so let's keep growing.

Sunday, September 14, 2014

Old Habits Die Hard

What does insanity mean?  Doing the same thing, while expecting different results.  So, the obvious here is to stop doing the old toxic habit.  The results of doing it are going to be the same, so then you think to yourself, why did I do that shit again?  I tend to worry about situations and anticipate the scenarios, which doesn't make any sense at all because they haven't happened yet. In addition, I'm wrong about how they'll turn out because anxiety blows stuff out of proportion.  Emotions and our brains are powerful combinations.  Old habits get ingrained and they're just damn hard to change.  I'll get nervous and worry about scenarios when I am fully aware that the worrying just wastes energy.  Besides, if I have a rehearsal or gig, all I can do is to prepare as best I can.  Of course I always feel like I'm not always prepared enough, so that doesn't help.  Dale Carnegie's advice about accepting the worst thing that could happen and moving on is much easier said then done.  I have adventurous thoughts for lack of a better word about what the worst thing can be.  It's a funny thing because there are times when I imagine a scenario going well and it works a lot better for me and the people around me in the situation.  How do you like that?  My default state is to be nervous and worry though.  What's the solution to that? Fake it till you make it? It can be baffling because all the anxiety never helps anything.
   Old habits that don't work need to be thrown out.  Accentuate the good and throw out the bad.  Again, easier said then done, right?  It feels like if should be easy though.  How do bad habits serve us?  They're familiar for one thing, they keep us in our comfort zone, and they're so stinking hard to break.  Whether they be addictions, food cravings, gambling or whatever, they are so damn hard to break.  Replacing the bad habits with good habits is the way to go.  Not an easy route to take.  It will be hard at first, but it's well worth it.  I need to try this myself on a lot of things.  I'm not the best at taking my own advice.  I feel funny giving advice at all on breaking habits.  I just know that when I have anxiety which is an old habit dying hard for me, I'm almost always wrong about the situations I'm playing out.

Monday, August 18, 2014

Post Bard Festival Blog Post

Long time no blog, so I will blog away now.  First off, what an amazing experience the Bard Festival was.  I shed some tears when I was driving home last night.  Leon Botstein runs one hell of a summer festival.  It's astounding how much he does for people as far as educating them and promoting culture.  Plus he provides employment to many artists in this country, and for that I am grateful.  The level of talent and love for the music is unique.  I am having serious withdrawal right now. The e flat mass by Schubert is one of the greatest masses.  It's amazing how he wrote so much in such a short life and most of its good.  What an experience and fine group of people.  I'm not an ass kisser, and don't say these things unless I mean them.
   So, what's next?  Of course there is the usual stuff.  Church job, high holidays gig etc...   However, there's obviously a lot more to life.  I'm making an effort to be more open with people.  I was proud of myself for being friendlier at Bard this year.  I even danced at the Spiegeltent, after initially telling my friend Roosevelt no about twenty times. In life we keep growing, we keep getting out of our comfort zones and breaking inhibitions.  Life keeps going and I plan to keep growing.  Strides have been made, but there is a lot of work to be done.  My next goal honestly is working on discarding some poor habits.  For example, I need to follow all the way through on things.  Not easy, but essential.  Discipline is not always my strong point, so I plan to work on that.
   What else can I say here?  Being home for the first day from Bard was a bit unsettling.  It feels a bit lonely at the moment.  Accept for having my kitty back.  Yes I'm a softie at heart.  It was cool being around fellow artists and so many of them.  It's also astounding how many artists were employed this summer.  There are countries where fifteen dollars is a lot of money, and we were all employed this summer and doing what we love.  Anyway, I think I veered off topic a bit.  I'm in Bard withdrawal, and sort of feel like, what's next?  I guess more will be revealed.   When we go away for a while and then come home, there's an adjustment to be made.  I'm currently in the mode.  More later.  Love to all.

Monday, July 28, 2014

Stop Judging Yourself

     We are our own worst critics.  Fellow artists can probably identify with that statement.  The arts have enough criticism, so why do we need to do it to ourselves?  I don't mean constructive criticism.  I mean destructive criticism like you suck, that sucked,  that sounded like crap, you don't belong in this business etc... You get the picture.  I already know that destructive criticism is what it is, destructive and a waste of time.  However, I felt inspired to write this because I have been playing my new guitar for hours on end and just enjoying myself.  When I practice singing I start going into serious mode and can definitely judge myself without mercy.  When you start doing that
it is important to evaluate whether you would even say such things to your worst enemies.  I know I wouldn't say that stuff to my worst enemy or any of my students.  Playing the guitar is not what I do professionally.  However, it is worth mentioning here because I can practice it for hours and hours and never get tired or bored with it because I don't have the negative dialogue going on while I'm practicing.  Practicing singing and learning my texts can be the same way.  I don't see why not.  Judging myself is something I deal with a lot.  It's destructive and I find it very hard to overcome.  When I was playing the guitar earlier I was actually complementing myself for getting better and my inward critic was gone.  So I figured why can't I practice singing that way?

    Constructive criticism and judgement are different things in my opinion.  I am not judging my students when I give them constructive criticism.  I know also that my teacher doesn't judge me.  He just tells me what needs to be addressed.  Constructive criticism helps solve the issues at hand.  Judgement does not.  The key is to be present and focus on what you're doing.  If the negative judgment comes in then go back to the task at hand.  If you're really focused on your breath, what the character is saying, who you're talking to etc...who the hell has time for the negative judgement?  The judging takes away from the task at hand.  Realizing that I am my own worst enemy when I'm
singing is hard to swallow, but it's true.  The important thing is to stop the stinking negative judgment because it doesn't have to be like that.  All the judging is a good way to think your way out of taking risks.  Here's a simple fact that will bring this concept home.  Why not be grateful that you can sing in the first place?  Something could happen that could change that such as an illness, or accident.  Also think of how many people would love to be able to sing who cannot.  Leonard Bernstein longed for the gift to be able to sing.

       My objective in this post was to bring home the fact that negative judgement is a big waste of energy.  When I'm not judging myself I have so much more energy.  I used the example of practicing the guitar because I have been practicing it for hours a day and still have energy afterwards.  I feel at peace.  Singing can be the same way.  When I practice the guitar I can take the pressure off myself.  Sometimes when I practice singing I feel exhausted in like 10 minutes because of all the inner critic crap.  My whole point of this post is that it doesn't have to be like that.  I hope this blog post helps someone.

Tuesday, July 15, 2014

New Blog Post

It's been a long time since I blogged.  First of all, parents please stop leaving kids in hot cars.  Leaving kids or animals in hot cars is dangerous and might kill them.  I still hear of people leaving kids in a hot car even in wake of the hot car case taking place in Georgia.  The latest one I heard of today involved a woman leaving kids in the car while she was getting a haircut.  Why not bring the kids in the salon, or leave them with a sitter?  Good Samaritans broke the windows open with a hammer.  This was in Texas I believe, and it's hot there to put it mildy.  Come on.  This story pissed me off.  Especially since we have the case in Georgia going on.  Plus it seems like basic common sense to me to not leave kids or animals in a hot car.
    I also wanted to write this post to keep people updated on things.  It's been a quiet few weeks, and I don't mind that all.  I've even relaxing, exercising, eating well, continuing to work on my voice etc...  It's nice to have some breathing room for a while.  At first I was thrown off by the lack of structure, but I started re-reading Dale Carnegie's book "How to stop worrying and start living" and that has changed things.  It's important to keep busy, let go of past mistakes and change for the good.  I'm trying my best to do all those things.  Later this summer I will be in beautiful upstate NY at the Bard Music Festival at Bard College.  We are performing lots of works by Schubert and his contemporaries.  It should be a cool experience like last years festival was.  The level of musicianship is always very high at this festival.  A lot of the people involved are very talented and have done very interesting things in their lives.
  So what else?  I cannot believe how hard it is raining outside right now.  Wow!  I figured I would write more since I am currently in my car waiting for this monsoon to slow down.  It's good to have the rain because we absolutely need it.  Now it's ten minutes later and it's not raining anymore.  Okay, I get it.  Anyway, I think I'll end this here.  I'm going to play my guitar, and practice my audition rep. More opera related posts to come.  I figured I would make this one non opera.  It's good to mix it up a bit.

Friday, April 18, 2014

Verdi Simple?

  I am a complete Verdi nut, and he is my favorite opera composer.  Verdi completely changed the style of Italian opera in several different ways.  He started by writing in the belcanto style with his earlier operas.  However, even in those operas he increases the size of the orchestra and puts greater demands on singers then his predecessors Bellini, and Donizetti.  I am not saying that Bellini and Donizetti weren't demanding on singers, because they were.  Verdi increased those demands.  Singers who are not appropriate for certain Verdi roles can damage their voice.
   I would like to inform everyone who reads this that Verdi's works are never simple even though it might sound that way at times.  Verdi did get more complicated as he matured.  The characteristic um pa pa in the orchestral accompaniments essentially ceased to exist in late Verdi.  For example you never hear it in Aida, Otello or Falstaff, Verdi's last three operas.  You do hear it in his earlier works, but it always serves a purpose.  People say they don't like Verdi because of the um pa pa.  I say yeah whatever.  Try singing Verdi, then tell me that.  Verdi is among the hardest composers to perform for opera singers.  Verdi put insane demands on singers at times.  If you're not the right singer for the role of Otello, you could be done for career wise for example.  Verdi's early stuff may sound simple, but the vocal demands are as great or even greater than his later works.  Verdi characteristically wrote in a high tessitura for all voice types, including the chorus in his operas.
   Verdi's simplicity is not simple at all because it always serves strong purpose.  Let's look at a few musical examples that sound simple but are not.  The aria "La Donna e mobile" from "Rigoletto" sounds simple doesn't it?  It's deceptive because it's very hard to sing, and also the Duke is an evil guy.  Conte di Luna's aria "Il balen" from "Il Trovatore" sounds simple, but baritones refer to it as impossible to sing.  The melody is simple sounding, but again di Luna is an evil character.  The men's chorus in Rigoletto where they are telling the Duke how they abducted Gilda is a catchy tune.  However, the men are describing an abduction, plus rhythmically this piece has to be  very tight.  It's the conductor's job to keep the rhythm tight.  Verdi is hard to conduct because it is exposed.  My point of all this is to point out the subtle genius of Verdi.  There are many examples of Verdi' music sounding simple, yet being really difficult.  The subtle simplicity really comes across to the audience.  Verdi can make lust, kidnapping, and evil sound so simple and catchy which is absolutely genius.
   Verdi's level of maturity as a composer throughout his career is what makes him so fascinating for me personally.  Verdi completely changed the aria/cabaletta form, used the concerted finale at the ends of acts when he needed it,  not as a formula, reformed the baritone voice and mezzo soprano voices and put them in a class by themselves.  Those are only a few of the ways in which he changed opera.  So, for those who think Verdi is simple or boring, I would urge you to look at the librettos while listening to his operas.  Verdi went from going with the trends to completely changing Italian opera.  It's pretty fascinating if you think about it for a minute.  So, he is far from simple and just um pa pa in my opinion.

Monday, April 7, 2014

In Memory of John Shirley-Quirk

 On April 7, 2014 we lost an amazing human being, musician, and teacher.  John Shirley-Quirk was an English bass-baritone who premiered many works by famed British composer Benjamin Britten.  I admit that when I first encountered Mr. Shirley-Quirk as a freshman at Peabody I was really intimidated.  He was giving a master class and was being pretty stern with the participating students.  However, over time I got to know a wonderful man and a legendary artist who I viewed as a god like figure.   He had an amazing speaking and singing voice, is on well over a hundred recordings and he sang all over the world.  His voice was beautiful and he had a uniquely wide vocal range from bottom to top.  He also had a great sense of humor.  For example, I was reading German out loud in a monotonous voice because I was tired and he said "I don't want to be put to sleep.  Wake up!"   I also remember him telling someone in a master class that they sounded like they said pee because they didn't put the final consonant on at the end of a word.  I always enjoyed the laid back and friendly atmosphere of his repertoire class, and he cared a great deal about all of his students.
   John Shirley-Quirk had great success in his career, and as a teacher.  I would say that riding in a boat with Benjamin Britten indicates some serious success.  Despite his success, he also faced a lot of tragedies in his life.  He lost two wives, Patricia Hastings and Sara Watkins Shirley-Quirk and his daughter Emily.  These loses were not only tragic, but to my knowledge completely unexpected.  I attended Emily's funeral in 2001, and I really admired the strength Mr. Shirley-Quirk exhibited during the funeral.  I don't know how anyone can go through something like that, especially considering Emily was only fifteen.  He came to school and taught the following day.  I could see he was in great pain as anyone would be, but I was really impressed with how strong he was and how strong he stayed.
     There are many memories I have of John Shirley-Quirk.  I remember singing Beethoven 9, and he was the bass soloist.  He also recorded that same solo for famed conductor Carlo Maria Giulini.  I also remember singing the Mozart Requiem for a 9/11 memorial concert and he was the bass soloist.  I remember him singing parts of Britten's War Requiem from memory in a workshop he was giving on the work.  Also, I remember him singing "Auf dem Kirchofe" by Brahms, and also he sang the first song of "Schumann's Liederkreis Op. 39" for me in a class.  I had to sing it again after that, which was an impossible act to follow.  I also remember him being really pissed off at me once in a recitative class for holding the penultimate syllables too long.  He was absolutely correct of course.  He is on many famous recordings with many famous conductors and pianists.   Probably my favorite of them all is his recording of Vaughan William's song cycle "Songs of Travel."  Mr. Shirley-Quirk's interpretation of that work sets the standard for performances of the work.  He is also on a famous recording of Mahler's eighth symphony under George Solti, and Handel's "Messiah" under Colin Davis to name a few.
    I was fortunate to work with Mr. Shirley-Quirk many times, and to be able to hear him sing in person many times.  I wish I had been able to see him again over the past decade. We all have to go because dying is a part of life, but it is always sad to lose someone you love and admire.  Mr. Shirley-Quirk will be missed by all who knew him, and the world of classical music will also miss his fantastic singing and sensitive musicianship.

First Spring Blog Post

Happy spring!  Yesterday's weather was showing some good signs of spring.  Not so sure about today, but oh well.  Anyway, I have several concerts coming up that are worth mentioning here.  The first is this Saturday at 4 pm at Barclay Square near the Princeton Forrestal Center.  That's Princeton, NJ not Illinois.  I will be singing some songs and duets with soprano Amy Suznovich, and Lynda Saponara will accompany us on the piano. We will present a unique variety of songs and arias, including some music in Polish.  After that I have Holy Week at St. Catherine of Siena church in New York City.  Hopefully after that we will still be able to stand up.  Then I am producing a concert called "Aftermath Recovery Benefit Concert for Haiyan Disaster Survivors" on Saturday May 3, 2014 at 7 PM.  I have a wonderful lineup of singers, plus my aunt Lisa Bottalico dancing flamenco and The Philippine Chamber Rondalla of New Jersey will be playing.  We will sing "Bayan Ko" with the Rondalla accompanying.  The event is sponsored by web of compassion.  If you cannot attend and
still want to donate to
the Typhoon Haiyan Relief Effort please go to  My goal is to have a full house at Christ Church, where the event will take place and to raise 2,500 dollars.  I hope to see you all there.  I am also involved in a repeat of the recital with Amy Suznovich at Highland Park Public library on Thursday June 5, 2014 at 7 PM.  In addition I have a concert at the Intrepid museum in NYC on May 15, a concert at St. Catherine of Siena on May 18, plus I am covering a small role with Chelsea Opera and singing in the ensemble of "The Tender Land" on June 13 and 14.  So, things are pretty busy.  It is good to keep busy though.  Even though I will be exhausted I don't mind.

Wednesday, March 19, 2014

Haiyan Recovery Benefit Concert May 3rd!

Dear Friends,
  I'm putting on an awesome concert to help the recovery effort in the Philippines.  My aunt Lisa Bottalico and uncle Joel Rudin will be involved in the project.  Come to this concert and listen and watch these awesome performers and people.  Here is info.

For Immediate Release

"Aftermath Recovery Benefit Concert for Haiyan Disaster Survivors"
at Christ Church in New Brunswick, NJ

New Brunswick, NJ – A benefit concert for Philippine survivors of Typhoon Haiyan will be held Saturday, May 3, 2014 at 7:00 p.m. at Christ Church, 5 Paterson Street, New Brunswick, NJ 08901. The event is produced by bass-baritone opera singer Nicholas Hay and sponsored by Web of Compassion. Suggested donation is twenty dollars for adults and ten dollars for students.
The event will represent a unique variety of music and culture including opera excerpts, flamenco dancing and Filipino music. The lineup of talented performers donating their efforts to help raise funds for this noteworthy cause include sopranos Amy Suznovich, Jenne Carey, and Alissa Indeck; mezzo soprano Jessica Renfro Ling; tenor John Villemaire; baritone Stan Lacey; bass-baritone Nicholas Hay; Flamenco dancer Lisa Bottalico, and the Philippine Chamber Rondalla of New Jersey.  Web of Compassion president Grace Asagra will speak on behalf of Web of Compassion.  

 On November 8, 2013 Typhoon Haiyan devastated the Philippines.  Typhoon Haiyan was the most powerful super storm ever recorded, and as a result, the aftermath has affected the lives of 1.47 million people. The already high death toll will rise if we do not help with the relief effort in the Philippines.  Therefore, it is critically important that people step up and help with the relief effort in order to help victims of the disaster who are in need.  As of today, over 6,000 people are dead, nearly 29,000 are injured, over a thousand still missing while countless numbers have lost their homes. The work to help the victims of the typhoon has only just begun. We are hoping to raise 2,500 dollars, so please come to this special event.

To learn more about this event, please contact:

Nicholas Hay
2 River Rd, Apt # 21
Highland Park, NJ 08904


Friday, February 21, 2014

What's Been Happening Lately

     I've been feeling kind of de-energized and unmotivated the last few days, so I figured I would write something.  Seeing Jonas Kaufmann in recital last night at Carnegie Hall was very inspiring.  He sure can sing.  On some passages he sang, I was thinking wow, how on earth is he doing that?  He also did quite a few encores after a very challenging program, and he sounded like he could go on all night.  Obviously he is singing with his body, and not his mind or throat, because if he weren't singing with his body, he would not have such impressive stamina.  I'm not a reviewer, so I'm not going to comment beyond saying it was really cool and inspiring.  
   Anyway, enough about that.  I am involved in a concert next weekend with Jeffrey Farrington, Jose Pietre-Coimbre and Patrick Durek.  It's next Sat at 7 at Christ Church in New Brunswick, an intimate church setting with strong acoustics.  My projects after that are a joint recital with soprano Amy Suznovich, and pianist Lynda Saponara, and a benefit concert for the Philippines featuring Filippino musicians, a strong lineup of singers and flamenco dancing by my aunt Lisa Bottalico.  These concerts will be great.  The performers are working really hard to make them possible.
    Now to non opera and music stuff I hope.  It's hard to get away from it, but there's a lot more to life than just music and opera.  I'm working on being as kind to people as I can and sticking up for myself in a kind way.  If I don't stick up for myself I end up hurting people because I become passive aggressively angry.  If something someone does bothers you it is fine to let the person know, but only in a kind and loving way.  Loving and kind works a lot better than aggressive and angry any day of the week.  If you get angry, the other person will pretty much always get angry too, or simply walk away.  Being angry especially in a passive aggressive manner just creates more problems.  The loving and kind way of dealing with issues is the only way that's ever worked for me.  Communicating is really important in professional situations, and relationships whether it be with friends or family.  Becoming angry at another person because I am too afraid to talk to them about something that was bothering me has not worked for me.  Being kind and loving is the key to good relationships.  

Wednesday, January 22, 2014

Stuff That's Going On

      This is my first blog post of 2014.  Happy blog new year to all.  I think 2013 ended on a good note for me.  I quit caffeine and I feel a lot better, and boy was that difficult to do.  Also, I finished the year with some nice concerts and services, and spending Christmas with my family.  Most importantly I grew as a human being in 2013, gaining more compassion and understanding towards others.  Compassion and understanding is always a work in progress for me.
      The year 2014 is looking good so far.  I am planning some recitals and am putting on a benefit concert to help the relief effort in the Philippines.  The concert for the Philippines is going to be an opera scenes concert consisting of excerpts from operas such as Cosi fan Tutte, Die Zauberflote, Die Lustigen Weiber Von Windsor, Candide, Lakme and Madama Butterfly to name a few.  This program will feature some of my finest colleagues and a guest speaker from Web of  Compassion to emphasize the need for help in the Philippines.  Before that I will doing a joint recital with soprano Amy Suznovich and Lynda Saponara.  This will be April 12 at the Barclay Square in Princeton, NJ.  Great music will be performed in an intimate setting.  In addition, I am going to be involved in some cool concerts at St. Catherine of Sienna Church.  Also, I will be performing with my ensemble, The Thoreau Concert at Christ Church in New Brunswick on March 1 at 7 PM.  Certainly PM, because I ain't doing it at 7 in the am folks.  This concert will feature Patrick Durek on classical guitar, Jeffrey Farrington tickling the ivories, and Jose Pietre-Coimbre tickling the fiddle.  So, lots of music events to look forward to, and more to come of course.  No upcoming year is complete without a lot of performances.
    The most important thing I have been working on in my life lately, and which I really want to continue this year is to have a positive attitude.  Having a positive attitude actually takes a lot of work for me.  Everytime I get into a negative mindset, I just trust the powers that be that things are going to work out.  Actually that's bullshit.  Sometimes I don't trust the powers that be that things are going to work out, but when I do, it is a much easier way to live.  I don't want to live with an attitude of regret, anger, bitterness and misery.  I guess that can be fun in a weird way, if you like to waste a lot of energy.  I find it easier to have faith that things are going to work out in a good way.
     Also, I want to urge people who bully others to cease and desist.  I post on bullying a lot because I was bullied.  However, what I went through was nothing based on what I hear happening today.  When I was bullied it was just words.  It was seldom physical, and the internet wasn't in full swing yet.  With the internet being so widely used now in 2014, we need to watch what we say about others.   So forget hatred and get to know love.  Love is part of our higher selves, and it is the best way to treat others.  I am not trying to sound like a saint.  I am far from being a saint, but the idea of loving others works a lot better than hate.  I recently saw a story on HLN about a seven year old boy who has cancer.  As a result of undergoing chemo the boy experienced hair loss.  You want to know what his friend did?  His friend shaved his head to so he could support his friend with cancer.  I want to hear more about that then stories about bullying.