Changing the things I can change
There is this really awesome prayer which says “God, grant us the serenity to accept the things we cannot change, the courage to change the things we can, and the wisdom to know the difference.”. The words “us” and “we” can be changed to “me” and “I” if a person sees fit. There is also the short version “fuck it.” The dude’s approach in “The Big Lebowski” does come in handy sometimes.” The longer version which I quoted above which is not the whole thing does carry a lot of weight. We cannot change the events which took place in the past. I cannot change the fact that people made fun of my weight or that bullies picked on me. I can change the way I look at the past by forgiving. Hard to do, but it is essential to try. If you want to stop trying, keep trying anyway. It is essential to forgive for the sake of emotional health. I cannot change the fact that I am not going to be the next Roger Federer. Too bad, right? Courage to change sure is a tough concept to put into practice. I can totally be the cowardly lion sometimes even though that is a temporary easy way out. Well, I do not want to be the king of any forest. That is a big responsibility.
Having courage to make positive changes is scary because it is unfamiliar territory. Knowing the difference is pretty straight forward. I can make positive changes which are within reasonable bounds. I just need to have the courage to make them. Easier said then done. Sometimes, I need to call instead of email, or talk in person versus on the phone. Not easy, but making changes like that make me useful I can totally change the way I look at things. I can change what I eat, my attitude towards things, my weight etc… I cannot change how people think of me or how they react to me. I often think I can. Talk about a bullshit story. I can change how I view other people. If I can make a change that will result in my being useful to myself and others, that is a pretty good change. If I say that I cannot do something in the present that I am capable of doing, I shut off all possibility. I cannot change the fact the people get sick and die. That word accept can be inconvenient sometimes because it can be hard to swallow. What other choice is there? Life has it’s ups and downs and curveballs, fastballs, sliders and sinkers, and change ups. I can change how I deal with those situations. I can accept what happens versus sitting in a timeout chair with my arms folded. Accepting what I can and cannot change is a long process. As I learn it, I become more and more serene. Most of all, I become a useful person.
nicholashayoperahistorian 